I’ve been on a lot of planes recently to and from Austin, and some of our studio conversations have been bouncing around in my head, including a recurring theme of “Things No One Tells You When Wedding Planning”, or at the very least, certain tips that pop up time and time again during our work with our clients.
So here’s our first installment, in no particular order:
1. Guest List is one of the first, and biggest, hurdles.
This is the first task in which everyone involved – you, your fiance and your respective families – begin to talk about expectations in terms of size, formality, style, and the inevitable budget. I find it’s important to figure out who will have the final say on guest count and list, while finding a way to stick to your guns and communicate your own wants and needs. Also realize that while this wedding is centered around celebrating a couple, it’s simultaneously bringing two families together.
2. Someone is usually going to be really unhappy with a decision you make. Everyone is still happy on your wedding day.
A number of us are people pleasers, and genuinely want to ensure that our mothers, in-laws, siblings, best friends, are happy and taken care of. Usually, however, someone disagrees with an idea of ours and often feels comfortable to let us know that. I know that while planning my own wedding we encountered that more than once, which made me think through what would make others happy versus the best decision for us. Ultimately, I’d recommend considering what aspects are important to you, what is important to your parents, and if anything that isn’t as critical to you but is important to them, it might be worth compromising.
3. Bridesmaids Dress Shopping is [usually] a minefield.
You will find something in the end, I promise. It’s very rare that all girls agree on a particular style, color, length, etc. etc. etc and since they’re all your best friends and family, there is often a chorus of opinions. I personally the mixed dress trend for this reason alone – what looks great on a lady with a small chest looks under-dressed for a larger bust. It’s best to figure out what style and possibly a brand if you want to have a more cohesive look [colors are relatively flexible, or ought to be], while if you’re game for a fully mix-matched look, a set of color, style, length parameters has worked splendidly in the past.
4. The Invitations are a big point for everyone, and there’s usually an audible sigh of relief when they go out.
As the resident graphic designer, I’ve found this for almost every client. There’s always a lot of excitement [and nerves, and a bit of anxiousness] surrounding the design, printing, waiting for, and mailing of the invitations on time. It’s the first part that truly makes the wedding feel real and that It’s Actually Happening. And from a creative standpoint, it’s also the first piece that truly gives guests a hint of what’s to come, so, understandably, there’s some anticipation! The good news is, that after they go out, guests receive and rave about them, there is literally and figuratively, a sigh of relief.
5. Moms usually want to just be a part of the wedding planning.
Most of our mothers got married in the era in which their mothers planned their wedding and they were grateful on-lookers. Thus, our mothers watched their beautiful daughters grow up, envisioning that they get to plan or help plan their weddings one day. Fast forward to the actual planning process, and the current day and age when the bride is often very involved, and many moms can feel a little left out. With that in mind, and the realization that they really do just want to be involved, I often recommend finding activity or something to give to the moms complete ownership of, be it bedazzled flip flops, the rehearsal dinner, welcome bags, etc. A quick fix that often works wonders!
We have some other points up our sleeves, but are there any others that you’ve found? Or noticed during your own planning, or your clients’?